I Got It Completely Wrong When I Said Steamboat Was Making a Comeback

Steamboat is not going to make a comeback. Arkansas Quarterback Cole Kelley, aka Steamboat, will not make a comeback because it turns out that he shares many traits of Steamboats in general. He is large, slow, doesn't go very fast upstream, is very susceptible to damage from logs, and is very much out of date. New, better transportation technology exists that has surpassed Steamboats; there are newer, different quarterback prototypes that are better suited to playing the modern game of football.

After allowing Kelley to stay in the North Texas game for a long time despite Kelley playing very poorly, Head Coach Morris would be a fool to allow Kelley to remain the quarterback. He very wisely decided to let a different quarterback who also managed to shit the bed against a subpar team, Ty Storey, get the start against Auburn.

Ladies and Gentleman, Storey Time is making a comeback!

...(can we please let Freshman Daulton Hyatt play quarterback?)